Kids on the Brain

I've been thinking a lot about what kind of parent I'm going to be, so if my posts lean that direction for a while, I apologize. I think I'm going to be a mean dad. I'm already coming up with ways to torment my children's Saturdays, and the one I have isn't even one year old yet. Cleaning the bathroom, mowing the lawn, doing the laundry. Pretty much everything I had to do as a kid. Of course, I didn't have to do any of that until I was like 8 or 9, but it's good to plan ahead.

I haven't decided if I'm going to pit them against each other, or overly discipline them equally, causing them to band together in their dislike for me. I know as a kid, through no effort of my parents (that I know of) my brothers and I were at each other's throats, constantly competing and bickering. And not in the "we really love each other but we want to have fun rough-housing" sort of way, but more in the "if I only had a place to hide the body" sort of way.

I definitely don't want my kids to be my friends. I think that's the downfall of a lot of parents. A fear of disciplining because their worried it will drive their children away. While I agree that can be true (there were times when I really really really didn't like my parents) I think it's short sighted. I blame TV. Our ADD-addled brains have turned our lives into 30 minute sitcoms, and if the resolution doesn't come quick enough then it's easier not to face the problem at all.

I like to take a longer view. Sure, my kids are gong to hate me. They're going to mumble under their breath against me, go to bed and cry their eyes out, and maybe even come right out and elucidate their disdain for me. But they don't have to like me. They just have to survive intact. If they have a good head on their shoulders, if they can make it out in the real world, that would be good too. If they are some kind of superstar athlete and can fund a world wide vacation for their mom and me, I ain't gonna complain. Nobel/Pulitzer prizes here and there would be a nice bonus.