Coming Up On Level 3

Does anybody else get the feeling that raising a child is like playing an MMORPG? Not exactly like it, but you gotta admit there are some striking similarities. It seems like to level up at one of these role-playing games, first you have to get the gem from this place, but to get the gem first you have to get the map from this other place, but to get the map you have to go defeat the ogre in this other place. And on and on and on.

I feel like I'm just trying to level up my children until I reach the ultimate goal of producing a functioning member of society. But to get there I have to go through grueling hours of all the little details that have to be accomplished to get to a particular goal, like learning to walk, or speak, or use the bathroom. Of course to walk they first have to roll over. Then they have to start crawling. Then pulling up on furniture. And on and on and on.

I find that in the games I've played, I didn't necessarily want to beat the game, or be the best, or have the highest rating. I would set myself a slightly lower goal and try really hard to accomplish that, like getting in the top 10,000 on the leaderboard or something. The same is true of raising a child. Don't get me wrong, if I can manage to produce the first female president then woohoo, but at the moment I'm just interested in having a conversation with my toddler that actually makes sense.